Ichiban- the lipstick for babies

Charlotte's purple mouth is starting to fade and I think we're both finally getting over the thrush. We started swaddling her at night and this seems to make a big difference. You wouldn't think a baby would like her arms pinned to her sides, but she seems to sleep better like that and even slept through the night Monday night when I swaddled her tight. Last night I swaddled her, but not real tight and she got up at 3:30 and she was out of it.

I've got lots on my mind about going back to work and I need to start writing stuff down so I stop obsessing about it. Just stuff about Charlotte, what to tell the day care, what to pack, how to set up the bottle stuff, etc. I thought I was coming to terms with back to work, but I cried about it again today. There is just no getting around it, I will have a really tough time, just like every other working mom. At least I only have 4 months and then summer!

Dave gave me quite a surprise. I had requested more "bling" for our 5th wedding anniversary. When we got married, I picked out some plain bands and felt like that was right for me. But then I started noticing other ladies's lovely sparkles. So I thought a nice channel set sparkly band (or two) would complement my ring nicely. But Dave gave me this:

You'll notice that it isn't my engagement stone. It's a whole new ring. The center stone is twice the size and the others add up to alot more than I thought I'd have. He said, "I know it is more that you wanted, but it is what you deserve". Very sweet. I'm not sure about it, I feel sad for my other rings, which we could make into necklaces. I generally prefer round brilliant cut to the princess square. I have 30 days to return it. Again, my original stone means so much. I just don't know. What do you think?

Purple Pie Gal of Porcupine Peak

Or shall I call her Purplesaurus Rex? Or maybe a Purple People Eater? Whatever you call her, she's cute!

I used Gentian violet to try to rid Charlotte and I of thrush (now I have real purple-nurples). It freaked me out the first morning when I saw her purple stained face, but I think it is working. Coincidentally, Charlotte also has found her tongue. She loves to stick it out, waggle it around, and show it off. Check out the video:

Our trip to Cleveland

Last weekend Dave and I headed back to his mom's house in Cleveland. I was nervous taking the baby so far and we haven't spent the night anywhere but home yet. but the ride was good, she slept the whole time. We stopped at the border and fed her. We left at 1:00 and got there at 6:30.

We got our pic taken for his mom's birthday (his sister's idea) and it was very nice. I just got my haircut and hadn't figured out how to do it best yet. Today I felt like I finally liked it. Too late!

Our trip home was memorable. We stopped again at the border this time to gas up and found that our headlights and brake lights were out! Scary. With the crummy weather, headlights are necessary, and brake lights are always necessary. But we didn't want to leave the car on the other side of he state and have to go back to get it somehow. So we decided to chance it and drove straight home. This was tough since the baby was supposed to eat at 3:30 and we got home at 5:30 and man was she hungry!

I took the car in today and we need a new light modulator. They gave us a loaner that is rather nice, a BMW X3, it's a 2007 SUV and it has a heated stearing wheel!

While we were in cleveland I was experiencing alot of pain and soreness in my right breast and I called my sister who said that she had plugged ducts and to use a hot water bottle on it. I also called the lactation consultants at Baby Beloved and they gave me some interesting suggestions. one was to feed baby in football hold and Australian hold (baby sits on lap straddling leg) and to feel "on all fours". I did these things and it looks like I'm all better :-) this is good since a plugged duct could develop into mastitis and be infected and need medicine and be really really painful.

So one week left til I go back to work. Gradually preparing myself even though there is no real preparation.

Do I have to go back to work?

The answer is no, but reasonably, it would be stupid not to. If I chose to not finish the year (take a "Child care leave" I'd not only forfeit the rest of my years pay, which is indeed reasonable, but I'd also be responsible for paying back my insurance premiums. I'm told that is in the neighborhood of 15K. That's a new car. It would just be stupid to do that.

So instead, I'm returning for the 16 weeks left to finish out the year. I cry every time I think about it. It isn't just that I don't want to work (hey, who really does?), the issue is being away from Charlotte. I just want to be with her and take care of her. Not slave away for ungrateful urchins all day and see my daughter for like three hours at night.

She is being slightly crabbier than usual and I suspect the three month growth spurt is the culprit. However, I need to keep an eye on her getting up in the middle of the night, which has happened for the past 7 days. She had gone to sleeping through the night most nights, but now I get a 1 or 2 am wakeup. I feed her, but it is possible she is just waking up and needs to go back to sleep. So we need to have Dave comfort her (because mom=food) and try just getting her back down. Even with the crabbiness she is really just a doll and I adore her.

Monday we went to visit my sister and her kids. We looked at baby books for Sophia and Sam and they pretty much look the same now. So even though I wonder what Charlotte will look like, she'll just look like herself, as she is now. Speaking of which, we took some pics that are super-duper cute. They show how well she holds herself up, the other one is just funny because she was hungry but I wanted to take a picture. Not a good idea- the baby is ALWAYS the boss!

Baby Update

We took a family picture last weekend. Charlotte is wearing the dress I made :-)

Yeast update: we have an appointment with the pediatrician on Friday to ascertain whether the thrush is receding rapidly enough. Also, my ob won't give me more cream unless the ped. says I still need to be treated. I'm out of cream and it is a great relief not to be applying and removing that crud 7 times a day. I also don't need to go through 16 breast pad a day.

Bottle Battle: yesterday, i took Charlotte to day care (Linda) for a trial run and hoping for bottle success. I took her there around 8:30 and just worried alot. I called at 11 am and she had tried the bottle a couple of times and said Charlotte didn't seem hungry (though I know she was, she ate 4 hours previously and before that it had been 9 hours). Then I called again at noon and she had some success. I guess Charlotte was sort of sleepy and finally latched on and took about 5 ounces. I picked her up and when we got home she napped and when she woke up was just frantic to eat. When I tried to burp her she went nuts and just couldn't get enough!

So, although it was a bit of a battle, she did actually take the damn thing and I don't think I have to worry that she'll hold out all day when I go back to work. I'll be taking her back sometime next week for another day.


Sleep: After a week of a super cranky baby at night, I finally realized she was just tired and needed to be put down earlier. Now she eats around 8:30 and is typically in bed by 9 pm. She now has slept until 7 am (with no feeds in between) a few days. I hope it continues and I am getting used to sleeping all night as long as the stupid cats don't wake me up!

Also, I joined a mom group, Mothers and More and look forward to being part of that. There are monthly meetings, playgroups to join, email listserves, activities such as wine tasting and sledding and probably lots more. I'm very excited about this and hope to be active even though I go back to work in 2.5 weeks.